One Reason to Remain a Cubs Fan

I don’t know where Cubs manager Dusty Baker stands with respect to the Lord, but I’m pretty sure he’s not into the occult:

“I’ve got a real weird religion,” [White Sox manager Ozzie] Guillen said.


“Santeria,” he said.

It’s a bloody religion, imported from Africa. Guillen believes in animal sacrifice.

Heck, if Chicago fans had known it would work like this, they might have endorsed human sacrifice.

You kill animals, Ozzie?

“Back in my country [Venezuela], yes, I do,” Guillen said.

He realized how this sounded and blurted, unsolicited, just in case you didn’t like it:

“Too bad.”

Ozzie, Ozzie, Ozzie. You’ve got a World Series ring, but that’s going to be worthless to you half a second after your last breath.

Santeria is a blending of the West African Yoruba religion and Roman Catholicism, created by slaves in 16th century Cuba:

Noticing the parallels between their native religion and Catholicism, and in order to please their slave-masters and fulfill their own religious needs, they created a secret religion. Santeria uses Catholic saints and personages as fronts for their own god and Orishas (spiritual emissaries). Thus, when a slave prayed to an Orisha, it looked as if they were praying to a saint.

Interesting the originators of Santeria found enough parallels with Roman Catholicism that they were able to hide their polytheistic beliefs behind a Catholic veneer.

Too bad for Ozzie.


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